The Mystery of Family

"The family you come from isn't nearly as important as the family you're going to have." - Ring Lardner, American Writer (1885-1933)

I have heard a number of variations of the sentiment above from authors, psychologists, pastors, historians, etc. but I like the way that Ring Lardner puts it perhaps best of all. Like some people, blogging can occassionally be a form of "therapy" for me. I suppose anytime one puts thoughts to paper, or in this case to the keyboard, it is that way. It is also a way to record some memories (before I forget them) so the memories can survive a muddled brain that is constantly juggling a million things and remembering daily details and a plethora of to do's in our family's life.

I am often in the car driving to and from various doctor appointments as well as speech and physical therapy programs, and the twins are in the back reading stories, singing or chatting with one another as we drive. When you're in the car a lot like I am, you begin to find yourself pondering life, relationships, God, family, all kinds of stuff. Sometimes I think about wonderful things to blog about here, but usually those thoughts are gone by the time I come and sit down at my computer.

My goal in blogging at Twinsanity has always been to share about the positive aspects of my family, my life with twins, my experiences as a wife and as a mother. I may break this "rule" from time to time, but this post today is not one of those times.

I have a lot of really great memories of my childhood. I had a wonderful childhood, oh sure, there were the tough times once in a while and there were times and experiences that I'd like to forget but thankfully, those were the exception and not the rule to my childhood.

My childhood memories are made up of all kinds of moments; and looking back upon my childhood, and as a parent now myself, I find a new appreciation and value in the role of my own parents. They helped me grow, they always loved me, they helped me make good decisions, they comforted me in disappointment, broken relationships or hard times.

Now, I'm a woman and mother myself, and as wonderful as my childhood was, I have recently found myself thinking upon the statment at the outset of this blog posting: "The family you come from isn't nearly as important as the family you're going to have." And, how true that is. While we certainly will always have our experiences from our own childhoods, our parents and our siblings, what is also inescapable is that once you marry, start a family and begin raising your own children, the family from which you came begins to take a back seat, if you will, to the family to which you are now making for yourself. Family is a mystery like that, I suppose. Everyone comes from a family, and those who go onto create their own family begin to forge new family relationships in a way that I could have never even fathomed until becoming married and a parent myself.

So, here at this blog, I often think about that. I think about what I hope and wish for in my children's lives and futures. I realize that they're "ours" for only a few years really; that utlimately they will grow into young adults and young women, perhaps marry, have children, and begin families of their own. I am committed to writing in this blog about their little lives, their futures, their happiness, their potential, their talents, their experiences. I might not always talk here about how as twin sisters they fight because I don't wish for them to remember their childhood fights as much as I wish for them to remember their childhood love and hugs with each other. I also hope that someday when they are young adults, or even mothers themselves, that they will be able to remember memories and experiences from their childhoods, just as I have, that will make them smile, laugh, even cry.....

Life is good these days, in spite of some difficult and challenging situations. We are all healthy. We are a family of 4, blessed beyond measure. Although there is stress in our lives - as any married couple raising children, managing a household, and juggling all the balls of life that come with that responsibility - I'm truly thankful for the haven of my family in between our moments of stress or strife.

As I was growing up, my parents often talked with me about giving everything that is important to me over to God through prayer. I do find myself turning to God in prayer a little more these days because as with everything in life that is important to me and my family, taking it to God in prayer seems equally as important. As I look ahead to the many more years of raising our children, I hope that we will always help to facilitate the same in Paige and Taylor - teaching them to turn to God in prayer in both the good and the tough times, teaching them to make good decisions, comforting them if/when they don't make good decisions, helping them mend broken hearts if their hearts are ever saddened; and, then, eventually watching them take flight from our little nest to building lives and nests of their own with their families. Someday, we will even have the Ring Lardner "talk" with Paige and Taylor about how the family that they "came from isn't nearly as important as the family they're going to have" and/or the children they're going to raise....